My Dress Reform Journey: By Sis' Thandi (Imperfect mom of three blogger)

It is so true that "sanctification is a work of a lifetime." Daily, God shows us how far we are from Him, how to get closer, and what our next step towards Him should be. That's how it was with my dress reform journey too! I was 'born in' the church and was just a normal SDA. Dressed like the world, ate like the world (minus the pork and unscaled fish), acted like the world and went to church on Saturday. Until I met my husband and I studied a book he had on Righteousness by Faith and read his SOP library. Those were heady days. I felt renewed and refreshed. I realised I had been parched and finally the Spring was flowing for me. I even wanted to quit university and just open up all my time to God. Of course he ('boyfriend' at the time) said no :-)

It was my darling who first made me think about my clothing and how it relates to God by bringing it to my attention how odd it was that females never wore pants to church but wore them elsewhere. Wasn't God everywhere? So why fake holiness at church and not just be unholy the whole time? I tried the "But there are pants for women" argument but honestly, it was just my meat-eating brain that was arguing. Once I started reforming my diet, my brain was more receptive to truth. Just because Satan has made a way for an abomination to be acceptable doesn't mean it's not abomination. I cringe when I think back to the day a female shouted, "Nice butt!" at me. Talk about unholy! So, the pants dropped off. Then back on for work uniform in England and when my conscience seared me, I quit work. (We had to climb up ladders and it would not have been modest for me to do so wearing skirts with men below.)

So, the pants went off and the skirts and dresses stayed on. 

Next, was the head. While we were still courting but with him now overseas, there was an International Sabbath at church. We were told to wear our traditional gear and I was all for it. But the more people spoke about the programs for the day, the more I pictured the outfits, the more uncomfortable I grew. The day was now about us and not about God. I quit being in charge of the Sabbath School programme and changed my mind about looking for a traditional outfit. Instead I thought, "Hmm, we are spiritual Israel, I'm going to dress like a Jewess." And on went the heacovering. The week after that Sabbath, I studied headcovering. It didn't make sense to me why women weren't covering anymore. After studying 1 Cor 11, I knew that I needed to do it for any time I spoke about God, or prayed. So on it went for church and prayer. I remember calling my 'guy' and asking, "Did you know women are meant to cover their heads? Why didn't you tell me!" Like God, he had been patient with me. He knew it, but could see that I was still wrestling with pants. His other reason was that he could see that I was sincerely studying so I'd definitely find the headcovering truth too. Only years later did I think, "Wait a minute. I'm always talking to God. I'm always therefore, praying. I need to cover fulltime." What brought this to mind. The Headcovering group I was part of on Facebook. Run by non-SDA. And on the headcovering stayed all day, every day.

Next? Lengths! I wore dresses and skirts but the lengths were all over the place. None above the knee but still not proper. We were in Tanzania as missionaries when the light came. It was simple. God gave Adam and Eve coats that covered their arms and their legs fully. And when you study the SOP, this principle is still meant to be adhered to. Uh oh, what to do now? I only had two long sleeved jerseys and VERY few long skirts. But God had spoken. So even on the hottest day I wore jerseys and my one long skirt, every day. Obedience needs to be immediate and though pride said no, God said, "Yes." At the same time, I had to discard my high heels too! What was already a small store of clothing (seeing as we'd had to pack a lot of things for our entire family including rice, baby food etc in our car) grew even smaller. But my joy grew larger. There is something about knowing you are following God that makes the uncomfortable heat comfortable. That makes your dismay in wearing the same thing every day, disappear. 

My journey of a lifetime continues. I got rid of my wedding band, as did my husband. I changed my hair styles too. No braids, no health deforming things like relaxers. Just natural hair. And the type of clothing is also changing. I got rid of a lovely long skirt that had some sequins on it. No need to bring attention to myself. Same reason I went from formal hats to headscarves (doeks) to church. My hats were the type you'd see at weddings and when people would comment on how beautiful they were, I knew it was time to change to something more modest. Plus I'd found a quote about large hats and being in people's way in church so they couldn't see the preacher. 

Sanctification is truly a journey of a lifetime. Covering the head is a huge act of humility for most women. And dress reform is linked to health reform. Every step we take towards God gives us more light. I pray that as pride is laid in the dust, we lay ourselves at Christ's pierced feet. Ellen White said that dress reform is a cross. I agree. But like her, I thank God for that cross. When I was still beginning this journey, a day in actually, a woman ran towards a friend and I. She said she was on the taxi but glimpsed us and had to get off just to tell us that she could see by how we were dressed that we were Christians and that we should keep it up. We happened to be wearing long loose skirts that day. A few hours later at a bookshop, another lady said she could tell by our dress and the way we carried ourselves that we were unashamed Christians. Our dress is preaching a message. Are we gathering with Christ, or are we scattering from Him. I know what I want to do, and He is able to keep me from falling. He is able to keep you from falling too.

(My comment:Note that modesty is not conditional:at all times we are to represent Christ in our dress,even at the beach :-))

My Dress Reform Journey:Part 2

When God made it clear to me that I was to no longer wear trousers and short skirts/dresses (revealing limbs) I was happy but at the same time I felt anxious.I didn't want to look  unpresentable plus I didn't even know how to wear modestly since there wasn't anyone I knew who dressed so.But God, through His providences led me to a Youtube video (Hem of his garment ministries) someone had shared  on fb.When I got there it was talking about how to dress modestly and instantly I knew He was leading me.God is  the author of beauty-so we need not worry about that aspect.He will take care of it.

The hardest part was departing with my high heels,with some of my mini-dresses and my braided her.It seemed like a burden too much to carry.But I now look at what Christ did and know no sacrifice is too much.On the other hand I was nervous about what people would say.But at the same time I was cut by the message and I knew I had to change my dress and it's been a journey!Plus if we do not adhere to the light that has been shared ,it then becomes a curse.There are times where you get discouraged because you are the only one covering your hair and covering up but God uses even  one person to lead others to truth.But at the same time I had to be careful and ask for humility,lest I thought I was more righteous!As much as the way we dress must glorify God,we are to ever to keep in mind that a character after Christ's likeness is what will take us to heaven.

I'm still reforming even now.It hasn't been easy finding long skirts for someone of my height and at times that's really discouraging,so you end up buying whatever you can find(need to learn how to sew).But God has been faithful and I've learnt that when God has called us to something,He provides the means and He will even teach us-but we must allow the Holy Spirit to guide.When He tells us that "the dress is not appropriate" we need to let go.

To those sisters who'd like to reform in dress:Always keep in the forefront that the "work of reformation starts with the heart" and God requires to rid us of sin and produce His character in us and have us bear the fruit of the Spirit.Pray earnestly to God and ask for His Guidance and with a receptive heart study the matter;so that you are founded on God's word and you can answer when asked about your dress.Also,do it for God-if you do it for Him, you will not go back to your old dressing style and even if people may start calling you names, you won't be shaken.

And some,who like me, who depend on their parents for funds- you may wonder where you are to start.But all I can say :²⁵ “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? ²⁶ Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷ Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life^[e]?~Matthew 6:25-27

It might take a year or much longer to change your clothes to be what God would have them be.Sometimes you might even have to wear the short skirts since you might have one long skirt or two which are for church.But do not be discouraged.In due time,God will provide and do not let the matter of dress occupy the mind in so much that you neglect cultivating a character like Christ's.Dress reform is God's mean to cultivate in us His character-I see it in my life.To those who have the means,do not any longer use God's money to buy that which will not glorify Him.

I feel the responsibility of allowing the Holy Spirit not only to mold my dress but my character because I do not want to be like the fig tree that appeared fruitful until Jesus got closer to it.The heart must be right-then the speech,the character and our influence will draw others to God !  

CLEO'S DRESS REFORM JOURNEY

Why the sudden change Cleo?

Many of you may be asking yourselves that question, especially those who grew up with me or those who watched me as I grew.

Let me start by saying, "It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not." Lamentations 3:22.

As I mentioned in my previous post that God has the appointed time for us to know and understand certain things. As we seek Him, He will be found of us, that's what He has promised us in Jeremiah 29:13.
Miniskirts, pants, spaghetti/string tops were ever in my wardrobe. They were all "normal" to me. To me God was just for church not for my wardrobe or food and habits. When I started attending the Adventist church, I had only 3 skirts and one of them was just above the knees and the rest were the knee length. So one Sabbath I wore the shorter one and a mother from church called me(in a very nice way) and said to me, "we don't wear mini skirts to church" and I said ok. Soon after that I had a battle in my mind,  should I heed her words or should I ignore them, after all who is she to tell me how to  dress. But I just forgot about it and carried on in my skirts. 

Let me mention this -in case I forget- fashion is no friend to anyone,  she may be winning you fans and you may be adored by almost all but trust me,  when she is done with you, the only place suitable for you(according to her) will be the grave and eternal destruction together with her.

When I got to high school and made friends,  I was almost hooked into fashion, but I thank God for my mother who did not buy me clothes because fashion says, "this is the in thing". Although I wished to look as "hot" as some of my school mates,  circumstances forbade me. I had many clothes but I was just not satisfied! I wore short shorts knowing fully well that some brother's head would be turned just to look at my beautiful legs (oh how I am disgusted,  even at the thought of it).

As I look back now I realise that though I did not know God, he protected me from a lot of harm. I remember some women telling mom that I had a beautiful slender body and she should allow me to do modelling and she always refused and I got upset about that, I tried entering some designing competitions (I designed clothes as well but somehow I was lazy to publish them) but the doors were CLOSED! So I only dreamt. 

Let me fast forward to beginning of my dress reformation. One day we were talking with my sister and brothers from church and one brother said that my wife will never wear pants unless she rebels.  And that struck me! And I had a battle once more, but I love pants so much! I can't survive in SKIRTS! I can tolerate it just for Sabbath but not the whole week! Aah no ways! 

At that time my sister was all skirts and I wondered how she did it and her dressing was piercing me inside because I knew it was right, I regret to say I tried discouraging her. I just did not want to give away my clothes now, not yet!

One day as I was reading my Bible I came across this verse: Matthew 24:18 "Neither let him which is in the field return back to take his clothes."
And I thought what! Should the time of trouble begin and I'm in my pants, I will not be able to make it to heaven. At that moment I knew my wardrobe had to change.

I then began wearing my skirts even during the week and I loved my new look. Then in 2013 I heard about modesty and I thought I wear skirts so I'm modest,  little did I know that I was still wearing "fig leaves"{Genesis 3}. I then began to search the writings of Ellen White to know just what is this modesty and God began to work in my heart,  He can not have me speak about heaven looking like a worldling, nay! To clear my confusion on on other issues on dress, he placed before me women,  who through their lifestyles I learnt how to dress for the glory of God.  And I have never been so happy and satisfied about my dressing as I am now. 

There's a group on Facebook called: Dress reform rises from the ashes, that I joined sometime last year. There's a lady who posted a presentation on dress reform and as I read, I could not help but tremble at the thought that I wasn't dressed before God! I felt naked and as I finished reading, there was a link at the bottom: www.sistersinskirts.com 

What I read from the linked changed my life forever. I remember reading one of the testimonies there and I was convinced without a doubt that my wardrobe needed to change. I wept and pleaded with God to forgive me and to provide clothes for me that glorify Him. I only had 3 modest clothes, the rest were aprons. I started with my church wardrobe, then went to the one of during the week and I'm pleased to say God has been and continues to be good to me in this area of my life.  :D

Concerning my head covering, I was introduced to a group of missionaries late 2013 and one thing I noticed with the ladies is that, they always covered their hair and that used to trouble me a lot because, from the cultural view only married women cover their heads but now I was confused because the missionaries were varsity students and were not married. I prayed about it until one day when someone asked me, "have you ever thought of covering your head" and I thought, could this be God speaking through the individual so that I may study the matter. I prayed even more and asked a missionary sister who always covered her head to help and she did and her help changed my life for good!

Somehow this reform demands respect from brothers, being called with inappropriate names has ceased too.

And my reasons for changing my dress keep increasing, not only is God glorified but my health improves as well. 

In conclusion I'd like to say that,  many of our sisters die, are dying and will die because of being slaves of fashion when they know how God will have them dress like. And by die I mean the death that we die now and the eternal death. My dear sisters in Christ,  Pride should not be nourished in your hearts by your obedience to fashion, the end thereof is death. 

1 Timothy 2:9 - 10

9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works. 

The path to eternal life is steep and rugged. Take no additional weights to retard your progress. AH 67.2

Finally one friend says, "dress the way you want to be addressed".