Are you burdened with a list of your sins? Has your Christian journey been a roller-coaster, instead of an upward journey with continual victory? Do you find that you have true, godly motives, with no fruits? Are you confessing the same sin over and over again; not because you have not forsaken it, but because you are haunted by images of yourself partaking in it? Are you living in fear- fear that you may be beyond God’s grace and it might be that, your experience was just a hoax? Are you fearful that you may go back to your ways? Have you reached a point where you don’t even cast your cares on Him? Are you so scared that, you’ve disappointed God on countless occasions that you’re tempted to let go of the free gift of salvation?
I can relate. I’ve been there. Still going through it. BUT THERE IS HOPE in our hopelessness.
Here’s the promise: “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness”. -1 John 1:9
All we need to do is to confess. We need not to cleanse ourselves; we need not to bring blood to make atonement for our sins. We need not a lump sum to purchase forgiveness. We need not an earthly priest to confess on our behalf. The condition is only one, to confess, and with the condition is the free gift of forgiveness and cleansing from ALL unrighteousness. Not that our confession commends us, but the One who calls us to confess loves us and has given Christ for the ‘propitiation for our sins’ (1 John 4:10).
Moreover, He is faithful and just. In our unfaithfulness, He remains faithful. And only on this premise we lay hold on the promise.
“God requires that we confess our sins, and humble our hearts before him; but at the same time we should have confidence in him as a tender Father, who will not forsake those who put their trust in him. Many of us walk by sight, and not by faith. We believe the things that are seen, but do not appreciate the precious promises given us in God's word; and yet we cannot dishonor God more decidedly than by showing that we distrust what he says, and question whether the Lord is in earnest with us or is deceiving us.”- Gospel Workers, E.G. White, p.411
“God does not give us up because of our sins. We may make mistakes, and grieve his Spirit; but when we repent, and come to him with contrite hearts, he will not turn us away.’’- Gospel Workers, E.G. White, p.411
Through the eyes of faith, lay hold on this promise: Behold the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of the world (John 1:29). Even our sins!
If we want to solve murder,we cannot start killing
If we want to solve crime,we cannot all resort to crime
If we want to solve racism,we ourselves must not be racists
The mindset of harming those who harm you does not help humanity.In fact, it is the cause of bloodshed and moral decline of the society.Whenever one decides to do avenge evil for evil,that only results in a worse case scenario and that only makes the future bleak.Imagine a society where black who are not racist,who see whites as other fellow beings,who must be loved and respected,were to decide to be hateful towards them.How would this actually benefit them?I can attest that whenever you resolve to do evil for evil,you who avenge,suffer the most.Instead of being at peace,you suffer more.Your energy is constantly absorbed in harming the other party,you become bitter and you live a life that has not touched anyone.For what is the point of doing good to those who do you good?I view this as a selfish motive-doing good so that you can benefit.
As a Christian,Christ is our example.In our sinful nature,whenever one harms you,you just want to retaliate.But in all honesty,retaliation is defeat.It is a form of weakness.I know it's a hard pill to swallow,but it's the truth.I've come to learn that we will never have peace while we hate or cherish evil thoughts towards others.I have learnt these lessons on occasions where someone has harmed me.I remember how angry I was when I got mugged.If I was given the weapon,I'd be even willing to commit murder-I'm not a killer!But that's how angry I was.But did my anger bring back my phone,tablet,money,textbook?No,instead hating on the robber just made me unhappy and depressed.
In fact,retaliation does not bring any change.It hinders growth of the individual and the person misses out on many opportunities.In the scenario of racism,you actually miss out on developing beautiful friendships and actually improving the society at large-through peace.And if you look deeper,your salvation is a stake.
Looking at Christ,our example,even though he was mistreated,he never reacted.What would have happened if he retaliated?He would have sinned and a stain of sin would be found in him,removing him from being a spotless sacrifice,thus dismissing Him from being a ransom for our sins.Then all humanity would be enslaved to sin and eternal death will follow since God cannot coexist with sin.It would've been a sad ending.
Psalm 37:1-2King James Version (KJV)
37 Fret not thyself because of evildoers, neither be thou envious against the workers of iniquity.
2 For they shall soon be cut down like the grass, and wither as the green herb
Psalm 37:8-11King James Version (KJV)
8 Cease from anger, and forsake wrath: fret not thyself in any wise to do evil. 9 For evildoers shall be cut off: but those that wait upon the Lord, they shall inherit the earth. 10 For yet a little while, and the wicked shall not be: yea, thou shalt diligently consider his place, and it shall not be. 11 But the meek shall inherit the earth; and shall delight themselves in the abundance of peace.
When people speak badly about the killers in Rwanda’s genocide, I remind them that God is very patient.
By Isaac Ndwaniye, president, East Central Rwandan Conference, as told to Gina Wahlen, editor of the Mission Quarterly from the Office of Adventist Mission The
killers came on a Sabbath — brought onto the Seventh-day Adventist
Church’s compound by the mission president himself and his son, a
physician who served as medical director of the church-owned Mugonero
Hospital.
Many people had fled to the compound of the church’s
South Rwanda Field after the Rwandan genocide started on April 7, 1994.
Pastors and their families joined other church members in crowding into
the compound, and particularly the church building, thinking they would
be safe.
I worked as director of the publishing department for
the South Rwanda Field. The office, church, school, workers’ homes, and
Mugonero Hospital were all located on the same compound in an area of
Rwanda known as Kibuye.
The day before Rwandans began to kill one
another, I was attending publishing meetings at the Rwanda Union Mission
office in the country’s capital, Kigali. That night the president of
Rwanda was shot down in his plane, and the genocide began. The next day,
an employee at the Mugonero hospital called to say that my 14-year-old
son, Paul, had been killed and that my wife and children had fled to the
compound’s church for protection.
Then on Sabbath, April 16, the
killers entered the compound with the assistance of the mission
president and his son. How could this be? My father, a pastor, had
worked with this president while I was growing up. I had worked with him
and had no idea what was in his heart.
What saddened me even
more was that the pastors holed up inside the church with my wife and
eight other children had written a letter to the mission president,
telling him: “We know they’re coming to kill us. Please help us get a
boat to the lake and go to the Congo so we can be rescued.”
The
letter was taken by a soldier who was protecting them in the church to
the president’s nearby house on the compound. The president responded
that not even God could help them now.
People from all over the
country descended on the compound to kill the Adventists. Some of the
killers were Adventist. They came with grenades, machetes, knives —
anything that could kill a human being.
A pastor was preaching
when the killers entered the church. They first shot and killed him.
Then they started killing the others. My wife and children ran to the
president’s house for help, but he turned them away. Others ran toward
the hospital, trying to escape, but were caught by people waiting with
machetes. The killing inside the compound continued for several days.
Day and night the killers looked for those who might have escaped. They
even brought dogs to assist in the search in the bush.
By the time
the genocide ended in July, I had lost my entire family: my wife and
nine children, and my father and mother, three sisters, a brother, and a
brother-in-law.
Church for Displaced People
The outbreak
of the genocide made it impossible for me to return home. From Kigali, I
was taken by a group of soldiers to a camp for internally displaced
people in a northern province of the country.
I was the only
pastor in the camp, and I didn’t have time for sad thoughts. I found
that when you’re busy doing good, it makes you forget the bad things
that have happened to you. That’s how God strengthened me.
One
Friday evening I was walking around the city near the camp and saw an
abandoned Roman Catholic church. I asked for permission to pray and hold
services in the church. Receiving it, I went back to the camp and
invited people to come to the church on Sabbath.
We began to meet
as a congregation every Sabbath. Even though we were homeless, those
who had some money faithfully gave tithe and offerings as if they were
still at home. Sometimes people from Uganda came to visit and gave us
money, which we also tithed and used for offerings. We set aside the
tithe safely until the church in Rwanda could began working again, and
we used the offerings to help treat people injured in the war.
Many
people of other faiths joined the Adventists in worshipping every
Sabbath. By the time we were able to leave the camp four months later,
300 people were ready for baptism.
When the genocide was over in
July, I traveled to Kigali and found that no Adventist church was
operating in the country. So I went throughout the city, pleading with
people to return to church. Slowly, people returned to the churches, and
I was asked to serve as the church’s president for Rwanda for two
years. Later I was elected to the publishing department of the Rwandan
Union.
Five years later I was given the most challenging
invitation that I have ever received: Would I be willing to serve as
president of the very area that included the Mugonero compound where my
family had been killed?
I prayed about it and decided to go. This
would be the first time to go back and work with the people who had
killed my family. I didn’t know what to say when I returned alone, so I
prayed, “God help me and give me strength and words to say to these
people.”
I remember spending a whole night in prayer asking God
for clear direction shortly after my return. In the morning I knew that I
had to call everyone together for a meeting. I knew that if I didn’t
speak with the community from the very beginning, they would always feel
threatened by my presence. I needed to open up my heart.
So I called for a large district meeting on my first Sabbath back.
The
Rwanda Union “has sent me here to preach the good news, and to lead
this conference,” I said. “I don’t want anyone to tell me who killed my
family. I don’t even want you to tell me that you’re my friend. My
friend is the one who loves God and who loves God’s work. Let’s work
together in that spirit.”
I stayed there for three years and was
then called back to Kigali to serve as president of what is today the
East Central Rwandan Conference. We praise the Lord that our conference
has grown from 65,000 church members in 2004 to more than 110,000 today.
Among Rwanda’s total population of 12 million, the church has about
640,000 members, and we are now holding Bible studies as we prepare to
baptized 100,000 people after evangelistic meetings in late May. Read: Unprecedented 100,000 Baptisms Expected in Rwanda in May
Love and Forgiveness
My favorite Bible verse is John 3:16:
“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that
whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life”
(NKJV). If God had not loved everyone in the world, I would have gone
and killed the killers. But God loves them, and He gives them time to
repent.
The mission president and his son were tried and
sentenced to prison for crimes against humanity and genocide. The father
has died, while the son remains incarcerated.
When I was in the
camp during the genocide, a journalist came to interview me. He had
heard about how I had lost my entire family and asked me, “What do you
think about revenge?”
I took my Bible and opened to Hebrews 10:30-31:
“For we know Him who said, ‘Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,’ says the
Lord. And again, ‘The Lord will judge His people.’ It is a fearful thing
to fall into the hands of the living God.”
“It’s a scary thing when the Lord will come and catch you!” I said.
The journalist was amazed. He thought I was going to encourage revenge. But I had an answer from the Bible.
When
people speak badly about the killers, I like to remind them that we
have a God who is very patient with us. He’s very patient with everyone.
He doesn’t want anyone to perish. That’s the only thing that can help
someone like me who has gone through such circumstances. Anytime anyone
comes to God and asks for forgiveness, God forgives. There’s no sin God
can’t forgive. Death is not something that scares God. It’s not a big
problem for God.
Another thing that gives me strength today is
knowing that my family and the other pastors and families in the
compound church spent their last few days studying the Bible. They
prayed to God for forgiveness of their sins and asked forgiveness from
one another. That gives me strength to continue living because I know
one day I will see them again. I know they are sleeping and will wake up
one day. Because of that, I live for Him.
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